Last week, turkey and stuffing became approximately 1% of the nation’s body composition. Time away from the daily grind, lubricated by cranberry sauce and extended exposure to people who know you all too well leads to strange conversations. In a turkey induced meditation state, an idea came to me: mixing my love for 175 gram plastic discs with my infatuation with Thanksgiving, and so the discplate was born. Think of all the fancy dinner party possibilities.
Here are 13 ways to use your disc other than for playing Ultimate:
1) A saucer for your plant Simon, to protect that nice side table you just picked up from the thrift shop.
2) As a prop in your upcoming low-budget alien thriller.
3) A fancy hat for your fancy self when you receive a last minute invitation to the Kentucky derby, or are watching My Fair Lady. Come on Dover!
4) Chamber pot in a pinch.
5) To make insta-best friends. Give one to someone, or ask them to play with you and they’ll love you forever, guaranteed.
6) Cutting board when you are roughing it, or can’t be bothered to do dishes (https://www.instagram.com/p/9CsZP_LmbF/).
7) Backup instruments when your band forgets theirs, also needed: drumsticks, a handful of rubber bands and some imagination.
8) The tried and true party cup for a post-game pint, or 4.
9) The outer banks of the moat that protects your miniature castle from the fiery burps of the evil dragon Shane
10) Handy serving platter for when friends burrito contigo
11) Impromptu ice scraper for your car
12) A mini flying saucer sled for your puppy, or adorable pet ferret, or you, if your boot-ay is small enough.
13) World peace. Switch out all the guns for discs and we’d have one heck of a world tournament.
Even if you chalk some of those up to turkey-brain, I think we might have something. Now your turn.